Monday, February 15, 2010

These pages got hit with the ugly stick.

Ok, so Frances from the Paper Poppy Kit Co. posted the fifth in their seventeen days of giveaways leading up to the launch of their brand new kit company. Until now, they've asked for comments in order to be entered to win, but today, she asked for something different.

Today, she asked for ugly.

Now, calm down. She wasn't talking about ugly people. Not even ugly dogs (though she did post a photo of the blue-ribbon ugliest dog, and hoooooo-eeeeee is it ugly. It's so ugly it's cute!) No, she wanted neither of those. What she wanted was ugly layouts.

So of course I thought, "This one's in the bag. I will show you 10 shades of ugly, lady! Prepared to be assaulted with the ugliness I shall bestow!"

Actually, I thought, "sweet!" and carried on with my day. But...you know....it would have been cool if I thought in complete and humorous sentences like that.

After pouring over my albums, I have narrowed it down to two of the fugliest layouts ever created by someone who dares to call herself crafty. Prepare to feast your eyes on their hideous glory! I've even included close-ups so that you can truly come to appreciate their gawd-awfulness...you're welcome.

***Disclaimer and apology to the peeps in these photos: I think you're all wonderful and good-looking! But what I did to your photos is a crime. I deeply apologize for any harm I may have caused.

Ugly Layout #1:
This layout is ugly because:

a) the colour combo is bizarre. Plus, I smudged the word "Kris" on the vellum a bit, so I just smudged the whole thing to make it even.
b) I didn't know what to do with those multi-colour fibres. So I stitched them through the layout with a giant needle. Which left little humps allover my layout. {Don't let that Black Eyed Peas song fool you. There is nothing pleasant about "humps".} Plus, do you see the shadow next to the word "1st"? Ya. That's because I messed up the first layout I did with these photos, but I couldn't pry them off the paper...and I was a broke student so I couldn't afford to reprint them...so I cut the paper off of my collage (sort of) and re-adhered the whole works to this lovely shade of baby-poop green.
c) The tension was off on my sewing machine. I don't know how to fix tension on a sewing machine. I ignored it.

Didn't I tell you? Ugly. Take a deep breath, though, because this one is so ugly it's funny...

Ugly Layout #2I had a stencil. I thought it was cool. It didn't occur to me that it would take up the entire page.I also had one of those paper packs of various-sized mismatched cardstock. Those things should be outlawed.
People cut out of context! Nooooooo!
Just in case you didn't realize that I was scrapping about "fun" I made sure that word was made with photos of said fun. Creative, right?.....right? *cue crickets chirping

Whew. Well, if that's not enough to win me some prizes, I don't know what is. I can't wait to see your ugly pages, too! You have to link your pages here to enter to win.

Let the pageant of ugly begin! ;)

12 comments:

  1. You are hilarious, girlie! Thanks for entering the contest. We will definitely be "stealing" some of your lingo in upcoming posts....it is too funny not to share. :)

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  2. Hi Teri - Thanks so much for visiting my blog! I'm looking forward to looking through your posts!
    Alissa

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  3. Ok...my side hurts! Aphra told me you are a hoot, and she was not kidding. Thanks so much for playing along...hope you are having a good time!

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  4. WAIT.....WAIT! You are an English teacher! I should have known...you have a way with words chickie! I knew I liked you...so am I!

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  5. LOL I'm glad I found your blog! Those layouts aren't THAT bad! You should see some of mine. Yikes! I like the idea of sharing your ugliest....
    Nice blog decorations! You and I frequent similiar places on the WWW. Is your blog header from Shabby Miss Jenn too? It's gorgeous, and ooh, love your blog name!
    I think I met you while you were working at Carrie's store. I'm also on Scrapbooks Made Simple's design team.

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  6. LOL!!! Teri that's awesome.. I have a few 'uglies' myself... if I post them somewhere i will send the link... I also keep the very first page I scrapbooked as a reminder of how far I've come...

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  7. this was too funny! thanks for sharing the pages! i'm too scared to look for my ugly pages! this is weird to say...but good luck on the win! you're my kinda girl teri, i thoroughly enjoyed your post!!!

    hugs,
    mo

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  8. Teri, I got you runnin' scared! Do you think you can compete with mine? Yours are wickedly HORRIBLE! I mean that in the nicest,kindest way! Talk to ya later!
    Harris

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  9. OMG- I'm dying!!! This was so darn funny!!
    I posted my ugly earlier, but had to check back on everyone else's- so glad I found your blog! :)

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  10. Hi Teri! I had to wipe the tears out of my eyes from laughing so hard while I read your post. Then I had to pass my laptop to my husband so he could read what I was laughing at!! You should write comedy!! :) I think you may just win this contest!! ;)

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  11. Hi Teri! Just realized from your post on the kit club that you are from Northern Alberta! I'm in Sherwood Park, just outside Edmonton! Love meeting my fellow Canadians on the internet! :) Loved your proud Canadian post! I too am very proud to be a Canadian! :)

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  12. I LOVE your 'ugly' LO's! Especially the title cut from pictures! It's amazing to look at someone elses work and see elements of your own past LO's in them! But in all honesty....I think yours rock :)

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